Four questions to ask yourself and answer sincerely in order to have a successful relationship and marriage

Questions are powerful, when the right ones are asked and when answered sincerely. When you ask yourself questions, it helps your mind to become explicit as you answer them, it provokes hidden thoughts, it goes beyond scratching the surface of your mind and goes into its depth thereof to help you analyse the situation better, which then inform the decisions you have to make.

There are questions that you can ask in your marital pursuit to help you determine whether you are making the right decisions.

Now these questions are better asked before you fall head over heels in love! This is because after falling in love, your reasoning becomes influenced by your feelings and emotions, your decisions become biased and hearing God becomes more difficult.

So, the idea is always to seek God before falling in love. There is a difference between asking God for His direction and asking Him to bless your decision. Those are two different things entirely. It is wise in life to ask God for who He has blessed for you than to ask Him to bless who you have chosen for yourself. There is a blessing that comes with honoring God in your decisions.

Here are the questions to ask:

1. Do I really love this person?

You don’t travel down the road of marriage because of some form of being desperate. You don’t get hooked to just anybody because you feel time is no longer on your side. The pertinent question to ask is, ‘is there really love? It is only genuine love that can withstand the storms that are sure to come in later times. Never ever get involved with somebody you want to cope with. It will never last. There must be genuine interest springing up from a deep well of sincere and unfeigned love.

2. Is the love mutual?

There is nothing as frustrating as falling in love with the one that doesn’t love you. There is nothing as debilitating as pursuing the one that is running from you. The love has to be mutual! There is no need to spiritualise it and say that God spoke to you that somebody is your spouse. If God has spoken to you, let God speak to that person as well. There is only true love when the love becomes mutual and balanced. When you start showing love to someone that detests you, you can quickly earn the toga of a nuisance.

Why keep calling someone that never returns your call? Wake up and move on! Why beg somebody for three years? Move on and let God give you a new direction. Falling in love is not by force, you cannot claim anybody by ‘fire,’ it has to be by choice.

I have had to counsel a few people who are hoping a guy will still come back after he is already wedded to another lady, claiming that God spoke to them. God is not an author of confusion, and even if God spoke to you, what if the guy or lady refused to heed what God is saying? Are you going to keep on hoping? No, move on with your life. You need somebody that will love you as well, not somebody that will take advantage of your emotions and toy with you. There is nothing like having someone love you genuinely.

3. Am I willing to spend the rest of my life with this person?

The next question to ask is whether you want to actually spend your life with that person. By November this year, I would have been married for fifteen years, and yet it seems it is just starting. Are you ready to spend your life for decades with that person? Marriage is not a hundred meter dash; it is a marathon! Spending your marital life with a person you don’t love or like is nothing more than hell on earth!

4. Do I have peace?

Do you have peace about this person? Let’s take a look at the scripture.

Colossians 3:15(AMP)
And let the peace (soul harmony which comes) from Christ rule (act as umpire continually) in your hearts [deciding and settling with finality all questions that arise in your minds, in that peaceful state] to which as [members of Christ’s] one body you were also called [to live]. And be thankful (appreciative), [giving praise to God always].

It is this peace of God that settles with finality all questions that arise in your heart concerning the person you are considering. This peace of God is like a green light within telling you that all is well concerning your choice. When this peace is not there, it is like a red light telling you something is amiss. The peace of God is God’s voice resonating within you about His choice for you.

If you are already married, the thing to do is not to start asking whether he or she is the right person. You have gone past that. When you feel you are married to a wrong person, and you are not always right, what to do is to pray that God should turn every mistake into miracles, if indeed there were mistakes. I pray for you this morning, that God will arise for you in specific areas where you need His intervention in your life. I release the ministry of angels over your relationship, marriage, decisions and finances today in Yahushua name!

I am not confused. I have the light of God

Lord, lead me in the way to God in Yahushua name

Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness. (Colossians 3:15 Message)

Pray in the Spirit for about two hours concerning that decision


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